Prague

I can't control my excitement. I probably shouldn't blog about this yet because it's not entirely certain, but I am planning to travel to Prague for the month of July to attend a film workshop! Since I heard back from them this morning I have been making lists and plans and trying to decide if it's a good choice. Anyway, just a heads up for my friends that I might not be around for July.

Lucky Duck

Cold Cave is coming to the Wexner Center in two weeks! Right after Twin Shadow no less. Twin Shadow was great by the way (but the venue was terrible). If I were to converse with George it would go something like:

"Your jean jacket, white mesh shirt and bun was everything I had hoped. Your 80's revival-synth-rock brought me nostalgically back to a decade I never experienced. Soon everyone will love you since you are playing at Bonnaroo but I know that we will always have something special." --Leah

I'm also confirming that Spring is definitely here. It was very warm today. It feels so nice...

Spring, Maybe.

Today was officially the first day that I could walk outside in a t-shirt and jeans and not be cold and the caterpillars are also blooming so I think it might finally be Spring in Columbus. The caterpillars here are odd and they hang from all of the trees on their (caterpillar matter?) so it looks like they are floating in the air. Sound creepy? It is! I've walked right into them before and I had a nice little caterpillar on my shoulder when I got to class. Work was nice today. I got to hand draw and make buttons to give out at our event this Saturday, at which I will be chasing after kids making sock puppets. Buttons drawn include; a pig face with 50% of the button being nose, a film camera, an 80's boombox, a bird, and a handful of designs. I'm sort of wondering who in the world is going to pick up some of the things I drew. Oh, and I got a free cupcake from the cafe--score. Afterwards, I ate dinner at Kitzingers in German Village. I really love German Village. I will miss all of the little "villages" that Columbus has, they are neat to explore...I had to milk the day since it's going to be raining for the next week (literally).

Always cheers me right up

Small Black is the bomb. Also, going to see Twin Shadow tonight, very very excited :)

Hmmm

Sometimes I meet people and wonder, "how did you get into this school?" I know Ohio State isn't Yale or Harvard, but like, man--it's like walking around at the state fair sometimes.

Fall 2011

Warning: Excessively long post.

I have decided to go back to Tennessee and go to UTK next fall. It was really hard for me to make this choice which seems inexplicable to me considering all Columbus has put me through and how difficult it seems to be for me to function here. My dad told me that, "I can tell you don't want to let it go because I know how much you've put into Ohio State," and it's true, I have tried my best every single day here for two years and it still doesn't feel right. I'm holding onto OSU by a stubborn string. In my mind I am well aware of the reasons that I want to stay here:

1. My job at the Wexner Center, and the Wexner Center in general
2. Being closer to my Dad.
3. One or two really close friends that I will miss.
4. The nightlife, restaurants, museums, shopping (the fact that you can go to a party here and people don't just stare at you, but actually introduce themselves).
5. The amazing buildings (i.e. our library), etc.

But I've come to realize that all of these things are not able to make me happy. I left Knoxville for the sole purpose of getting out of Knoxville and it is difficult for me to objectively accept that Knoxville is in many ways good for me. Film has become very important to me and I think it will be easier to be creative and productive in a climate where I am comfortable and not dealing with extraneous problems all of the time. I want to go to graduate school for Film it and I need to start getting ready as soon as I can.

Coming back will be really strange; maybe it will feel like a time warp, maybe it will feel like I'm going back to high school. I will probably live with my mother and my dog to save money so I can go abroad and participate in film workshops. I'm trying to make mature decisions. Trying to be an adult is tough. I will have to overcome the things that I ran away from in Knoxville, and I will have to let myself let go of this feeling of "failure" that I am harboring. I am trying to accept that "failure" is actually a much more appropriate description for someone who does not try to make themselves happy.

I hope I can adjust when I come back. Columbus feels like my own separate little world now--something that is all mine, and it has changed me. If I hadn't left, I would still be utterly naive about, well, most everything. 

I have felt stressed and unsure about this decision since I made it 24 hours ago. I am scared/confused/disappointed/happy?/relieved?....crazy?< jk.

Heart-breakers

The dogs at the humane society are breaking my heart. They are all so amazing. How could anyone ever buy a dog from a breeder? It's just entirely superficial..I think people that buy dogs should have to watch another one be put down because that is exactly what they are enabling. It's like people just don't want to think about the consequences their actions have--they don't want to be responsible for what they eat, or what they buy because it's usually inconvenient. I sat in a cage with a dog for like 15 minutes while it fell asleep in my arms. I don't know how often I'll be able to go because I hate leaving.

On the flip side, I finally found a recycling center. I had to mapquest my way there. How lame is that, lol.